Smile Or Cry

Should I smile because we're friends or cry because that's all we'll ever be? I really hope that I know what to do. What action that I need to take. I feel so sad. I really want to cry. I cry not because I really love him. Tears fall because he never loves me at all. How sad.

He walks down the hall holding her hand. To everyone he looks happy and for sure he doesn't notice me. I sit and stare at him. I wonder if he'll ever care or if he’ll ever think and remember me. Force a smile, blink away the tears. I'm supposed to be strong, to have no fears. But I'm finding it hard not to frown. I'm such a strong person. Why am I breaking down? Why I have to feel so sad. I really want to cry. Tears are the words my heart uses to explain when my fake smile can’t cover up my pain.

It was just the other day when he smiled and asked how I was. I smiled and said I'm good. Then we both went on our way. Yeah I'm good, good at crying, good at lying, and good at remembering us.

Then I just realize that the worst way to miss someone is when their right there beside you and yet you know you can't have them. But what can I do. I just keep telling myself that everything is going to be ok even though I don't really think it will be. I really hope that I’ll be ok.